Forwarding of e-mails is one of the topics I get contacted about the most. And,
one which also causes hurt feelings and misunderstandings more than any other topic.
Daily, e-mails flow in from onliners asking about a "nice way" of telling someone
they care about, relative, friend or associate to not forward attachments, chain
e-mails, political commentary or the jokes that are so prevalent online.
Netizens are afraid to ask others to stop and those who are asked to stop, no
matter how nicely, get offended and feel as though their thoughtfulness is not appreciated.
But let's think about this a moment. How really thoughtful is it to click the forward
arrow, then a bunch of e-mail addresses and hit send? Well, your brain had to "think"
about those steps but does that make the effort truly "thoughtful." I don't think
so...
Here are the 5 Rules of Forwarding E-mails that those who are being truly thoughtful
follow. If everyone followed them all the problems associated with forwarded e-mails
could be avoided. Sticking to these guidelines will assist both those thinking they
are thoughtful and those who don't want to appear otherwise:
1. Don't forward anything without editing out all the forwarding >>>>, e-mail
addresses, headers and commentary from all the other forwarders. Don't make folks
look amongst all the gobbly-gook to see what it is you thought was worth forwarding.
If you must forward, only forward the actual "guts" or content of the e-mail that
you are of the opinion is valuable.
2. If you cannot take the time to write a personal comment at the top of your
forwarded e-mail to the person you are sending to - then you shouldn't forward it
at all.
3. Think carefully about if what you are forwarding will be of value (accurate
information), appreciated (something the recipient needs) or humorous (do they have
the same sense of humor as you do) to the person on the other side. Or do you just
think it is worthy? If you cannot think of why the person you are forwarding to
would like to receive the e-mail - then don't forward it.
4. It should go without saying that forwarding of chain letters (regardless how
noble the topic may seem), virus warnings or anything that says "forward to everyone
you know" simply shouldn't be forwarded because it is plain old B.S. or commentary
that many will not appreciate. But I have to say it because folks do so anyway.
5. If you must forward to more than one person, put your e-mail address in the
TO: field and all the others you are sending to in the BCC field to protect their
e-mail address from being published to those they do not know. This is a serious
privacy issue. Again, be sure to take the time to type a nice little comment about
why you are forwarding the e-mail to the recipient(s) at the top of your forward.
The above 5 rules will help qualify if an e-mail is worth forwarding and the
right way to do so if it is. If one cannot make these extra efforts, then they really
have no excuse to get mad or have hurt feelings when asked to stop. And if asked
to stop forwarding, don't get mad; just realize the person on the other side certainly
has the right to make that request.
At the end of the day, if you fear hurting someone's feelings by asking them
to stop forwarding you e-mail, know they probably meant well, were really thinking
of you, were trying to make a point - ahhh, just hit delete!
